Books have always been more or less essential part of my life. I started reading when I was some four years old and stopped just occasionally to enjoy other - so to speak - pleasures of life... Two years ago I found out about British Centre in district city near my hometown and began the deep dive into contemporary British literature. Funny thing is I hated it SO MUCH to write "reader's diary" back in schooldays, not just because of the fact we had to absorb mostly junk during the "ole commie times" literature lessons - rather due to my immense laziness. But years pass and my hard disc is not what it used to be (never anything special anyway), so I decided to keep a record of what I had read to prevent myself from one more embarrassment. Another important breakpoint came when I realized I couldn't cope with the news from real world, cancelled all my magazine subscriptions and thus cleaned time schedule and head at the same time.

The output follows. It's exactly what I said - aid to my poor memory, sometimes (to be more frequent in the future) supplemented with short evaluation, always with stars (just one would be waste of time, two mean hardly finished, three so-so, four quite good, five I really enjoyed it, and six I am not going to ever forget). Where there was a text related to the content on cover or wherever else - I've made use of it. Should you feel like sharing your views, adding a missing part of the story or just having a chat, there should be contact somewhere around...

Adams Amis Atwood Banks Banville P. Barker C. Barker Barrowcliffe Bond Boyd Brookmyre Brown Bryson Coe Coetzee Cook Davies Dawson DeWitt Dewar Donovan Edwars-Jones England Evans Faber Fox Freud Fry Gayle Glazebrook Grisham Haddon Hamilton-Paterson Heller Hird Hornby James Lebrecht Levy Litt Lodge Martel McCall Smith McEwan McGrath Noon Rankin Royle Rushdie Self Smith Thorne Warner Waters Welsh Winterson

IAN RANKIN

Knots & Crosses

 Theme: First of the famous Rebus series, unknown serial killer specialises in little girls without any apparent rules to follow

Point: you can never hide from your past no matter how hard you try

Storyline:

New fathom is in the town, this time killing just-turned-teen girls. No sexual motive. The monster keeps sending Rebus envelopes with knots and crosses made of wires and matchsticks together with messages like „clues are all around“ and stuff. All the time feels like there is something hidden in his SAS training past. And there is – his mate Gordon Reeve didn’t make it through especially designed torture unlike Rebus, who left the service afterwards pushing himself to forget about everything in the following years. Thanks to his brother / hypnotist Michael and new friend / colleague Gill Templer John approaches hidden chambers of his memory and the secret is revealed. Finally Rebus gets the right picture – Reeve picks his victims-to-be (whose initials lead to the name of Rebus’ daughter Samantha and the final one is she indeed) in the public library, where the ultimate battle of good vs evil takes place.

*****

IAN RANKIN

Watchman

Theme: Miles Flint is a spy, opposite of ambitious, reserved professional. Then something goes wrong.

Point: Are you sure you are on the right side? Really..?

Storyline:

Bombs are exploding in the streets of London, but life seems to have planted more subtle booby-traps for Miles Flint. His job is to watch, listen and report back to is superiors. Nothing more. Miles doesn't lust after promotion, and he doesn't want action. He wants, just for once, not to botch a case of suspicious Arab businessman nicknamed "Latchkey". Reluctant to go home, Miles joins his colleagues who follow the suspect, and he falls for quite simple trick with changed clothes. Latchkey succeeds to execute an Israeli secret service member. Miles is given one last chance for redemption – a trip to Belfast, which quickly becomes a flight of terror, murder, deceit and shocking discoveries. From a mere observer of arresting two bomb makers he becomes the third one to be got rid of. Miles escapes with Will Collins, and finds out life is not that black-and-white. Together they succeed to investigate the real plot – Miles's supervisor Partridge couldn't risk public scandal of disclosing his affair with another man, and had had him killed – by Will… World is a small place indeed.

"Watchman is a spy novel. My previous novel, Knots & Crosses, had involved a fairly cynical, worldly-wise cop, who'd been in the job for the best part of fifteen years. Miles Flint, my hero this time around, happens to be a fairly cynical, worldly-wise spy, who's spent twenty years or so in that world. The difference between the two men is that while Rebus is a man of action, preferring confrontation to rumination, Miles starts out just the opposite: he's a professional voyeur, and my job would be to change his role gradually from one of professional passivity to real ruthless activity."

***

TOBY LITT

Corpsing

Theme: Young couple is being shot at in a fancy restaurant – she is dead on the spot, his survival is kind of miracle. The only thing that drives him ever since is revenge.

Point: there is always one loving more – deeper and franker, and the other who sometimes even turns to hatred

Storyline:

Some mail-delivery man in sports outfit steps in the restaurant and fires six bullets in her body (rather extensive and detailed explanation of the bullet’s travel through tissues and bones opens most of the chapters) and another four in his. After some months in coma and slow recovery process he comes back to find out what a bitch she was, about the baby in her womb and the lovers she had had. Wife of one of her co-stars hired the assassin, herself being an under/average actress and face of some TV cereal advert. Contract should have been cancelled, but it’s the girlfriend who unexpectedly contacted the hitman again and revived the order to commit really strange kind of suicide-murder, because he made her pregnant and ruined everything for her.

*****

IMOGEN EDWARDS-JONES

My Canapé Hell

Theme: What lies under the shiny cover of delightful world of celebrities from the point of a columnist view

Point: Life among the upper 20,000 can be every bit as dull, boring and pointless as any other – it just may take a while to realize you are addicted

Storyline:

Abigail Long is an average young journalist in The News – London based newspaper that decides to go with the flow and introduce new column on celebrity life. Editor in chief picks Abigail to face the challenge, and so she does. With a little help of her friends / documentarist James, TV – something Wendy and comedian Colin she joins the roller coaster of never-ending parties, becoming just one more nameless journo bird asking ever the same questions, alone in the crowds of ostensibly entertaining people. She becomes a friend of Jack Morris, young star of Love Letters movie, and as such is the first to find his dead body later on. Having successfully nurtured coke addiction Abigail spirals downwards in her chase for fame assisted by Trevor Future – fat ugly PR shark who feasts on percentage of his mostly female stupid clients' success. Finally Abigail is found by her elder sister reaching the bottom apparently and goes through rehab. James coming back from Sri Lanka picks her up some weeks later, and everything seems to be on the right track with these two.

****

MATT THORNE

Pictures of You

Theme: How do young English in their late twenties and thirties, having jobs somehow connected to media, live? Thirteen days that change everything.

Point: Loneliness terrifies even the most independent and selfish ones.

Storyline:

Martin is a good fun. He is in mid-thirties, married and editor of Force magazine, which displays reduced turnover numbers. Martin gets sacked and offered a new job the very same day – to establish first ever mainstream porn mag. His relationship with Claudia is a complicated one, as he prefers company of his bit weird friends Naomi, Kenny etc. and he never says no to a nice lady. His assistant is Alison, attractive twenty something living with her sister Suzanne who will sleep with just about anyone and her boyfriend Adrian, the laziest man alive. She quite fancies her boss, though fully aware of is affairs. He on the other hand does not notice until one evening when they meet after a party outside McDonald. They start seeing each other no matter how hopeless they both know their situation is, none of them being exactly sure if this is it. Not really brutal and dangerous but nevertheless sexual attack of Suzanne’s weird boyfriend Joe and reluctance to admit this could have been true divides the sisters even further. Alison confesses her relationship to Suz, she transfers the story in her anger to Adrian and he leaves afterwards. Martin is a bit scared of the revenge of university secret society Thelemites as he shared their story with Claudia (her brother is about to be engaged to another former member) who leaks it during family lunch. The final kidnap scene however is not a work of angry Thelemites as he thinks, episode character of a German girl – and her twisted admirer – are the culprits. Is there any chance of happy life for people like these?

***

MATT THORNE

Tourist

Theme: How do young English in their late twenties and thirties live?

Point: Loneliness terrifies even the most independent and selfish ones – but they still enjoy it a lot.

Storyline:

Sarah Patton lives and works in Weston, apparently Brighton’s less known and successful relative. She sleeps with her boss Paul, together they plan to revive old deserted pier into a modern club (spaceship style). New staff is needed, this is why Mary and Neil are recruited. Another lover is Henry, older realty investor with spoiled daughter Anne-Marie. The lovers do not require much – occasional fuck with Paul on Wednesdays and Sundays with Henry. Henry has lent some money to Paul, thus the triangle works rather seamlessly. Sarah is a reserved, attractive twenty-seven, who ran away from her family in London. The reason is not completely clear, probably something to do with her first real love Charlie and his betrayal with friend Lesley, add complicated relationship with parents. Sarah spends her time between Paul’s office, part-time job in bowling alley, B&B home and clubs. Soon she starts an affair with younger Neil, more likely for the thrill of being able to seduce younger boys than for genuine attraction at first. It seems they could be good friends, even better than Amy and Vanessa from the alley. One day she accidentally finds Neil’s pager under her bed and has an unhappy idea to check saved messages. It is no big deal to gather up Mary sleeps with both Neil and Paul despite the many assurances she doesn’t. Lesley comes for a visit, though Sarah warned if anyone abuses the information on her whereabouts this way she will flee, this time not letting anyone know. Which she logically does. There is a letter at the end of book to her mother, proving the scars will take long to heal (if ever).

Thorne specializes in somehow empty and vain lives of young English people. They make their emotional existence so complicated it is hard to comprehend, especially for an Easterner like me. No wonder the demography is disastrous.

***

LAURA HIRD

Born Free

Theme: Disquieting snapshot of an “ordinary” family in Edinburgh falling apart at the seams

Point: You are not able to make the others happy and content if you can’t handle your own life – children repeat the mistakes of their parents.

Storyline:

Vic is a bus driver, rather unaware of how dysfunctional his family is until confronted with the fruits of what he in his too defensive and welcoming nature helped nurture. He loves his father Stewart, who is just another lonely Granda missing company of the people presumed to be the closest. Angie has had  a drinking problem few years ago and she drowns back to the bottom fast in her crappy affair with slimey Raymond – manager of bookie office where she works as a cashier. Her paranoid friend Caroline serves as a good excuse to leave home and meet Raymond after an encouraging bottle of voddie.

Joni will be sixteen soon and the major issue she is being resolving is her virginity and X2ing in the meantime before she loses it just to about anyone interested. She steals money from her mother’s envelopes, with her similarly boneheaded and hormone-driven friend Rosie she drinks herself brainless to two days of nausea afterwards at weekends in a desperate hunt for getting laid. She calls an emergency line for abused kids after Vic takes the duvet off her in the morning to help her wake up. She will most probably end up the same as her sorry excuse for a mother.

Jake is a fourteen years old PC games enthusiast, who would appreciate if the others do for him what he does for them – not sticking his nose in everybody else’s matters. Plus just a few friends would be great, and Sean’s family downstairs seems to be exactly it, even though Mum says they are bloody Catholics. He is bullied on regular basis by a thug called Shug and his friend (one of Joni’s erotic dreaming objects) Daniel. He almost doesn’t survive attack on a graveyard and it’s time to finally tell someone – together with an apology to Sean’s family for the pissed madness Angie has performed thinking it had been them who smashed him.

Raymond disappears with 15 grand leaving Angie to hit the alkie bottom after losing her job. Vic finally decides to kick her out, but it couldn’t be for Joni concluding a secret pact with Mum – she won’t tell about the missing envelope money and Joni will ask Dad to give Mum one last chance, though it was her pushing him earlier. In an attempt to score as many plus points as possible for eventual divorce proceedings Angie initiates marriage counseling session, where Vic ends up a complete asshole once again. They have a shag at the very last page, but it doesn’t feel like happy end at all. Very disturbing read.

*****

ESTHER FREUD

The Wild

Theme: Two single parents and their kids live “in harmony with nature” under one roof.

Point: It’s not easy to get along with each other no matter how hard you try.

Storyline:

Two single-parent families have come together under in an old bakery converted into a home – owner of the place “Wooden William” Strachan with Sandy, Doon and Honour (he struggled hard to get them at courts and finally won over Felicity, not always using clean tricks) and Francine with 14 years old Jake and Tess, 11. It is a new start for the latter, who sees in William - the tall, blond guitar-playing DIY expert – both the father she craves for (as her own one Victor is a bohemian writer, not caring too much) and a lover for her mother. She admires her history teacher Mr Paul and his vivid lessons of Norse mythology. When Francine becomes involved with William, Tess – eager to share their love – tries to please the adults as well as win Jake round. But then couple of incidents take place, when William asks her in front of the others why had she lied about not wetting her bed, her feelings cool out. Jake becomes straightforward enemy as William gets rid of his tomcat Odin. Francine finds out William spent a night in London with Melody (twisted American youngster), but forgives him also because there is their child, newborn Eve. But Jake is not the forgiving one and finally he almost succeeds in killing Will, but he injures himself instead. The incomplete families separate again, not showing serious pity about that.

***

MICHEL FABER

Under the Skin

Theme: Meat for doctor Jackson, just this time a bit more straightforward use.

Point: Is it really OK to eat the flesh of other living creatures, no matter how soulless and low in the hierarchy we humans see them?

Storyline: 

Isserley takes hitch hikers. Male, as healthy and big ones as possible, because muscle is what counts. She enquires a bit to make sure there are no toddlers and lass waiting, displays her amazing tits in a promise of adventure and finally gets to her real job.

She lives in Scottish highlands on Ablach Farm together with her supervisor Esswiss and bunch of workers, her cottage being one of the many shabby steadings around there. She wakes up every morning in almost unbearable pain, as he body is severely mutilated – half backbone amputated, surgically adjusted limbs and face, genitals removed completely: everything to make her look like the creatures she collects in her car. Because normally Isserley and her kin walk on all four, sometimes using the tail if need be to stand on hind legs, skin covered with soft fur. She works for Vess Incorporated and she is not from this world.

Amlis Vess comes for a secret visit, son of the richest man ever, who happens to dislike the very idea of taking over father’s business. He lets free four vodsels - monthlings to be exact – escape from the pens underground, but luckily Isserley and Esswiss hunt them all down. Amlis is confused about something and persuades Isserley to join him in the lowest underground level, but she succeeds in not showing that she in fact understands the word MERCY scratched by one tongueless, testicleless vodsel in the ground. It would hurt Amlis, who is opposed to eating meat anyway, not to speak about meat of thinking and feeling creatures.

It’s just a mater of time before Isserley experiences sexual attack, she comes out more mentally than physically wounded. She admires beautiful body of Amlis as opposed to crippled torso of hers, and finally something of his views find their way in her head, too. Nothing is the way it used to be, no matter how hard she tries. Vess incorporated ask her to deliver a female vodsel this time, with intact eggs and please no processing. There is definitely no future in what she is doing and living through. Isserley decides for a change, but lack of proper maintenance results in a car crash. Before she ignites the amviir that will smash everything in smithereens, she begs the woman who came to help to take away the body of her hitcher, this time one that forced himself in. There she goes...

******

 MICHEL FABER

The Crimson Petal and the White

Theme: Fallen woman and industrial tycoon in 1875/76 Victorian London

Point: There are various kinds of love, no matter how passionate emotions you share zou may face barriers not to be overcome

Storyline:

William Rackham is the younger of two sons of Rackham Perfumeries’ old founder . As Henry wants to become a parson since childhood, the burden of being an heir falls onto William, who would much prefer a career of writer, poet, philosopher or anything far from boring industrialist. His friends from university years Bodley and Ashwell enjoy pleasures of life by mouthfuls, but he may no longer join them, married and pressed by his father to take over the business. His wife Agnes is still a child inside, poor thing born to noble family, whose father died and mother re-married to Lord Unwin. She suffers from tumour behind her left eyeball, her violent mood swings diagnosed by doctor Curlew as typical case of madness curable in a sanatorium. William visits “houses of ill repute” occasionally, inspired by More sprees in London, specialised guide. This is how he finds out about Mrs. Castaway’s house and Sugar, girl who will do absolutely anything to make a man happy. He learns the skinny, tall redhead is not just a real professional, she is pretty smart, having read incredible number of books, able to discuss literature, politics or whatever else. He falls for Sugar on the spot and decides he can’t share her with anyone. That is why he finally surrenders and starts to study his father’s business – to gain financial independence and become able to have a mistress. Contract is concluded between him and Mrs. Castaway (Sugar’s mother, monster who showed first client to her daughter’s room when she was 13) and Sugar moves to her own furnished flat in Priory Close. She starts spying on William and his family, having finished her book – biography with fantasies of tortured men, poisonous stuff that helped her survive all those years – and without anything better to be occupied with. Only then she learns (together with reader) there is a child. Sophie was born to ignorant mother, who did not know what was going on and believes she had been possessed by devil eating her insides, and ever-busy father, attended only by her strict nurse. It is time to look for a governess, and Sugar comes up with an idea. She moves to the house, but things do not proceed exactly as she anticipated. She cures Sophie from wetting her bed every night, becomes quite a good teacher to surprisingly good pupil and does her best not to cause any trouble, but frequency of her encounters with William is paradoxically reduced. Agnes is in worse state every day. She buries her diaries in the garden. They are found by a servant and Sugar takes hold of them, discovering immense hollowness of young lady’s life. Agnes thinks the person seen behind the fence in last months was her guardian angel, Sugar becomes aware of that and exploits the opportunity, giving the confused lunatic instructions how to get to her dream shelter, sending her towards certain death in the country. But it does not bring the two closer. Even though she writes business letters for William, he is struck by the disaster, coming so early after he lost his brother, and is becoming more and more hostile. Sugar falls from stairs on purpose, hoping to cause miscarriage, and doctor Curlew finds out. William is informed and decides to dismiss Sugar from his life with ten pounds banknote and a letter of recommendation. Sugar tries to change his mind, but it is too late. She takes what is really dear to her in the house and runs away with Sophie. William meets Caroline, her friend, trollop who had been visited by Henry in his quest for saving at least one lost soul. But she knows nothing of Sugar’s whereabouts. Saved money allows the fugitive to do without anybody else’s help.

I was terrified by the number of pages at the beginning, but have enjoyed each and every one of them later. Pathetic, notoriously known, too bitter-sweet or whatever the plot may seem, you should give it a try. Dickens may well have written something like this if only he had had the chance, not tied up by conventions of the time. But he hasn’t. Faber did it, literally taking me by the hand from the very start. He provided me with a fascinating insight into English society more than hundred years ago, when modern times were just about to emerge from dust of renaissance and romanticism in factory chimneys and torn clothing of lumpenproletariat. Bravo.

SARAH WATERS

Affinity

Theme: Thoughtful spinster, mourning her father’s death, decides for charity work in women’s prison and meets her destiny there.

Point: You may never be over-cautious in this world, as betrayal and fraud are omnipresent.

Storyline:

Margaret Prior lost her father, the only living soul that understood her nature, not really fitting in the Victorian society (the year is 1874). After she had tried to commit suicide and lengthy rehab she is advised to work as a Lady Visitor to Millbank prison, women’s gaol. Sturdy matrons explain her role to be consoling one, she is not allowed to give the prisoners any news, her personality should provide an example to follow. She just wants to collect some experience for her writing at first, but then meets Selina Dawes, strange girl, doing her term for an assault on her client and host, which she claims being the work of ghost Peter Quick. Margaret in her private life becomes more and more detached from her younger and nicer sister Priscilla (to be married soon), her ever-scolding Mother, brother Stephen and especially his wife Helen, whom Margaret had loved passionately. The more she knows about the prison, the more her visits take their toll. Step by step she gives up her reason and falls for mysterious world of spiritualism, as she builds up her relationship with Selina, who seems to respond, and even attacks the ward when told she is to be moved to another, better prison for good behaviour. After Priscilla’s marriage the couple leaves for Italy, where Margaret with Pa had been supposed to travel. The family should come and stay with them at the Marishes estate once they are back, but Marge refuses to join – she needs to be alone in the house to execute her plan. Selina will escape from the prison with the help of her spirit friends, and Margaret does not doubt it, as reminders of her beloved Selina are delivered to her – flowers, hair, velvet collar etc. by ghosts already. Margaret withdraws money, buys gowns and other garment, and arranges passports and travel tickets to Italy, exactly as told. Then comes The Night – at dawn Selina should come, and Marge does not close her eyes, waiting. In the morning however there is nobody, and she can’t help herself and hurries to Millbank only to be told Dawes has escaped. Confused she returns to her house, where there miss Jelf, one of the matrons, waits to explain something… Her son died at four, and Selina was bringing him back for short whiles, and promised to take him to mother if she could leave the prison walls. With the help of her maid Ruth, now working for the Priors, she implements devilishly complicated and smart escape, so perfect the reader himself wishes the miracle to come true.

***

  SARAH WATERS

Fingersmith 

Theme: Really well thought-of story of greed, deceit and passion in Victorian England

Point: What is real love?

Storyline:

Sue Trinder, an orphan raised in 'a Fagin-like den of thieves' by her adoptive mother, Mrs. Sucksby, is sent to help Richard 'Gentleman' Rivers seduce a wealthy heiress. Posing as a maid, Sue is to gain the trust of the lady, Maud Lilly, and eventually persuade her to elope with Gentleman. Once they are married, Gentleman plans to commit Maud to a madhouse and claim her fortune for himself.
Sue travels to Maud's secluded home in the country, Briar, where she lives a sheltered life under the care of her uncle, Christopher Lilly. Like Sue, Maud was orphaned at birth; her mother died in a mental asylum, and she has never known her father. Her uncle uses her as a secretary to assist him in compiling a dictionary, and keeps her to the house, working with him in the silence of his library.
Sue and Maud forge an unlikely friendship, which develops into a mutual physical passion; after a time, Sue realizes she has fallen in love with Maud, and begins to regret her involvement in Gentleman's plot. Though deeply distressed, but feeling she has no choice, Sue persuades Maud to marry Gentleman, and the trio flee from Briar to a nearby church, where the two are hastily betrothed in a midnight ceremony.
Making a temporary home in a local cottage, and telling Maud they are simply waiting for their affairs to be brought to order in London, Gentleman and a reluctant Sue make arrangements for Maud to be committed to an asylum for the insane; her health has already waned as a result of the shock of leaving her quiet life at Briar, to Gentleman's delight. After a week, he and Sue escort an oblivious Maud to the asylum in a closed carriage. However, the doctors apprehend Sue on arrival, and from the cold reactions of Gentleman and the seemingly innocent Maud, Sue guesses that it is she who has been conned: "That bitch knew everything. She had been in on it from the start."

In the second part of the novel, Maud takes over the narrative. She describes her early life being raised by the nurses in the mental asylum where her mother died, and the sudden appearance of her uncle when she was ten, who arrives to take her to Briar to be his secretary.
Her induction into his rigid way of life is brutal; Maud is made to wear gloves constantly to preserve the surfaces of the books she is working on, and is denied food when she tires of labouring with her uncle in his library. Distressed, and missing her previous home, Maud begins to demonstrate sadistic tendencies, biting and kicking her maid, Agnes, and her abusive carer, Mrs Stiles. She harbours a deep resentment toward her mother for abandoning her, and develops a bizarre ritual of holding her mother's locket every night, and whispering to it how much she hates her.
Shockingly, Maud reveals that her uncle's work is not to compile a dictionary, but to assemble a bibliography of literary pornography, for the reference of future generations. In his own words, Christopher Lilly is a 'curator of poisons'. He introduces Maud to the keeping of the books- indexing them and such- when she is barely twelve, and deadens her reactions to the shocking material. As she grows older, Maud reads the material out for the appreciation of her uncle's colleagues. On one occasion, when asked by one of them how she can stand to curate such things, Maud answers, "I was bred to the task, as servants are."
She has resigned herself to a life serving her uncle's obscure ambition, when Richard Rivers arrives at Briar. He familiarises her with a plan to escape her exile in Briar; a plan involving the deception of a commonplace girl who will believe she had been sent to Briar to trick Maud out of her inheritance. After initial hesitation, Maud agrees to the plan, and receives Sue weeks later, pretending to know nothing about the plot.
Maud falls in love with Sue over time and, like Sue, begins to question whether she will be able to carry out Gentleman's plot as planned. Though overcome with guilt, Maud does, and travels with Gentleman to London after committing Sue to the asylum, claiming to the doctors that Sue was the mad Mrs Maud Rivers who believed she was a commonplace girl.
Instead of taking Maud to a house in Chelsea, as he had promised, Gentleman takes her to Mrs Sucksby in the Borough. It was, it turns out, Gentleman's plan to bring her here all along; and, Mrs Sucksby, who had orchestrated the entire plan, reveals to a stunned Maud that a lady, Marianne Lilly, had come to Lant Street seventeen years earlier, pregnant and alone. When Marianne discovered her cruel father and brother had found her, she begged Mrs Sucksby to take her newborn child and give her one of her 'farmed' infants to take its place. Sue, it turns out, was Marianne Lilly's true daughter, and Maud one of the many orphaned infants who had been placed on Mrs Sucksby's care after being abandoned. By the decree of Marianne's will, written on the night of the switch, both girls were entitled to a share of Marianne Lilly's fortune. By having Sue committed, Mrs Sucksby could intercept her share. She had planned the switch of the two girls for seventeen years, and enlisted the help of Gentleman to bring Maud to her in the weeks before her eighteenth birthday, when she would become legally entitled to the money. By setting Sue up as the 'mad Mrs Rivers', Gentleman could, by law, claim her fortune for himself.
Alone and friendless, Maud has no choice but to remain a prisoner at Lant Street. She makes one attempt to escape to the home of one of her uncle's friends, Mr Hawtrey, but he turns her away, appalled at the scandal that she has fallen into, and anxious to preserve his local reputation. Maud returns to Lant Street and finally submits to the care of Mrs Sucksby. It is then that Mrs Sucksby reveals to her that Maud was not an orphan that she took into her care, as she and Gentleman had told her, but Mrs Sucksby's own daughter.

The novel resumes Sue's narrative, picking up where Maud and Gentleman had left her in the mental asylum. Sue is devastated at Maud's betrayal and furious that Gentleman double-crossed her. When she screams to the asylum doctors that she is not Mrs Rivers but her maid Susan, they ignore her, as Gentleman (helped by Maud) has convinced them that that is precisely her delusion, and that she is really Maud Lilly Rivers, his troubled wife.
Sue is treated appallingly by the nurses in the asylum, being subjected to beatings and taunts on a regular basis. Such is her maltreatment and loneliness that, after a time, she begins to fear that she truly has gone mad. Heartbreakingly, she is sustained by the belief that Mrs Sucksby will find and rescue her. Sue dwells on Maud's betrayal, the devastation of which quickly turns to anger.
Sue's chance at freedom comes when Charles, a stable boy from Briar, comes to visit her. He is the nephew, it turns out, of the local woman (Mrs Cream) who owned the cottage the trio had stayed in on the night of Maud and Gentleman's wedding. Charles, a simple boy, had been pining for the charming attentions of Gentleman to such an extent that his father Mr Way had began to beat him, severely. Charles ran away, and had been directed to the asylum by Mrs Cream, who had had no idea of the nature of the place. Sue quickly enlists his help in her escape, persuading him to purchase a blank key and a file to give to her on his next visit. This he does, and Sue, using the skills learnt growing up in the Borough, escapes from the asylum and travels with Charles to London, with the intention of returning to Mrs Sucksby and her home in Lant Street.
On arrival, an astonished Sue sees Maud at her bedroom window. After days of watching the activity of her old home from a nearby boarding house, Sue sends Charles with a letter explaining all to Mrs Sucksby, still believing that it was Maud and Gentleman alone who deceived her. Charles returns, saying Maud intercepted the letter, and sends Sue a playing card- the Two of Hearts, representing lovers-in reply. Sue takes the token as a joke, and storms into the house to confront Maud, half-mad with rage. She tells everything to Mrs Sucksby, who pretends to have known nothing, and despite Mrs Sucksby's repeated attempts to calm her, swears she will kill Maud for what she has done to her. Gentleman arrives, and though initially shocked at Sue's escape, laughingly begins to tell Sue how Mrs Sucksby played her for a fool. Maud physically tries to stop him, knowing how the truth would devastate Sue; a scuffle between Maud, Gentleman and Mrs Sucksby ensues, and in the confusion, Gentleman is stabbed by the knife Sue had taken up to kill Maud, minutes earlier. He bleeds to death. A hysterical Charles alerts the police. Mrs Sucksby, at last sorry for how she has deceived the two girls, immediately confesses to the crime: "Lord knows, I'm sorry for it now; but I done it. And these girls here are innocent girls, and know nothing at all about it; and have harmed no-one."
Mrs Sucksby is sentenced to hang for killing Gentleman, and is executed; it is revealed that Richard Rivers was not a shamed gentleman at all, but a draper's son named Frederick Bunt, who had had ideas above his station. Maud disappears, though Sue sees her briefly at Mrs Sucksby's trial, and gathers from the prison matrons that Maud had been visiting Mrs Sucksby in the days leading up to her death. Sue remains unaware of her true parentage, until she finds the will of Marianne Lilly tucked in the folds of Mrs Sucksby's gown. Realizing everything, an overwhelmed Sue sets out to find Maud, beginning by returning to Briar. It is there she finds Maud, and the nature of Christopher Lilly's work is finally revealed to Sue. It is further revealed that Maud is now writing erotic fiction to sustain herself. The two girls, still very much in love with each other despite everything, make peace and give vent to their feelings at last. Wikipedia

Oh my, this one REALLY GOT ME. Fascinating. Almost as good as Crimson Petal and the White. I agree absolutely with the observation on the cover that goes: "There are always novels that you envy people for not yet having read, for the pleasure they still have to come." 546 pages in 5 days. Incredible.

******

JONATHAN COE

What a Carve Up!

Theme: Chronicle of a wealthy Winshaw family never to be fully completed by young writer Michael Owen

Point: There is very thin line between greed and madness.

Storyline:

Michael started writing when he was about eight years old, together with his friend Joan, and the work was pretty much inspired by his beloved gothic novel comic books and criminal stories. As an adult, after his Muse apparently left him when his second novel was published, he just happens to be offered a challenging task to compile a book about one of the wealthiest noble families in Great Britain. Lawrence is a tough businessman, suspected by his sister Tabitha to organise murder of the only nice sibling Godfrey in 1942 (he should have informed the Germans of his secret mission and they shot him down with his plane). Mortimer married Rebecca and escaped the Winshaw Towers, their two children being Hilary – Iknowitall columnist changing her viewpoints as coats and lovers – and Roddy, arts dealer who sells young artists for sexual favours. Another sister Dorothy marries a farmer and transforms once nature-friendly business in terrifying food industry, apparently being a prophet of mad cow disease etc. Godfrey’s son Mark ironically sells arms to whoever is able to pay, and seems to be unimpressed by the threat of oncoming war in Kuwait (on the contrary in fact). Thomas is a cold-hearted banker paranoid about his eyesight (as not touching anyone in his life) and Henry is a ruthless politician, selling his parent Labour for brighter career with Tories.

Michael himself leads very lonely life, after his unsuccessful marriage to some Verity and conflict with mother (she told him the man who died recently was not really his father) not talking to anyone for almost two years. His neighbour Fiona dies on him of cancer right at a time when they seem to become close. He becomes tired of the work for Tabitha Winshaw – confined in a mental health institution for some decades now, even though private investigator Findlay Onyx reveals some aspect that should be rather surprising, as for example he is not just observer, but part of the story. Godfrey had a co-pilot, who survived the attack and returned back and – made love once to Michael’s mother, then single girl.

The story end follows to a large extent scenario of Michael’s (since childhood) beloved movie that gave title to the book, story of a family killed one by one in a dark mansion by mysterious murderer. Finally the culprit is disclosed as Mortimer, just mocking his death in order to invite the rest of behated family for reading of the last will – and to murder them in rather inventious and horrible ways. Michael and Phoebe – one of Roddy’s earlier victims – are put together under the stress, but their romance is short-lived, as Tabitha manages to kill a pilot, who should have flown Michael back home, and take his place at the rudder.

Perfect style, deep enough insight in various industries, colourful characters.

*****

 JONATHAN COE

The Rotter’s Club

Theme: Teenagers, 70’s, the UK, Birmingham

Point: There is always something to treasure about one’s teens, no matter how difficult a stage it is

Storyline:

Sheila Trotter is reading the Daily Mail. Lois Trotter is reading Sounds. Her brother Paul is reading a rightist pamphlet Watership Down and her other brother Benjamin is supposedly doing his homework. Only few classmates at King William‘s call them by their real name, though. Lowest Rotter and Bent Rotter are much more frequent. Lois is looking through the personal column of the magazine, searching for a suitable candidate. Malcolm turns out to be the right guy later on, even Ben approves of him, as they share enthusiasm for intellectually demanding music. Unfortunately the love story ends abruptly just at the moment Malcolm wants to show Lois the engagement ring and IRA bomb explodes in the restaurant. Ben becomes a man of even fewer words. He only person he tells about his inner feelings is Lois, spending months in a hospital and recovering very slowly from the trauma. Major secret is that Ben has found God. He forgot his swimming trunks in dad’s car and almost dies from the idea of having to spend swimming lesson naked (vile PT teacher’s rule). His prayers in the locker room cause to open one door mysteriously and guess what’s inside... Another thing not to speak about is his love for Cicely, prima donna of the first rank as Claire Newman puts it. Cicely was always absolutely out of reach for Ben, but after his fierce critic in school magazine Bill Board she approaches him unexpectedly and makes him sort of personal advisor, the only one telling truth (article about the play of Othello). This does not mean a relationship Ben would wish for, that comes later, after he finds her in Wales, close to the camping site his family enjoys to visit each holiday. Each but one, when they are invited to Skagen by father’s German business partner. Nice intermezzo with two Danish boys and their hatred towards Germans, fuelled by their mother’s suicide (she never recuperated from the loss of her first love, killed by Nazis in WWII). Well, Ben finds Cicely, who spends holidays with her aunt and uncle. He even finds enough strength to call it a day with Emily, surprised of how lightly she accepts. In a sense Ben is still a virgin (incident in Doug’s parents’ wardrobe does not count) and this makes his moments with Cicely even more precious. A union is forged between Lois and Ben called after an album from Malcolm “The Rotters’ Club”.

There are others, of course. Claire plans carefully to make an interview with union leader Bill Anderton to find out more about her sister Miriam (she knows they were lovers from Miriam’s diary) and her disappearance. Philip Chase has a crush on her (returned years later), but his main worry is arts teacher Mr. Plumb, who tries hard to seduce his mother using all those strange and beautiful words. Fortunately his father Sam does not give up so easily, reads books on vocabulary improvement to scare the rival off by the worst imaginable flow of dirt he is able to conceive at the end... Doug Anderton knows he will be a journalist one day, writing for NME if possible. His article about Yes for Bill Board was quite good... Steven Richards, the only black student at King William’s, Othello and excellent sportsman, is a target of more or less open insults, worst from school’s best athlete so far, who feels endangered. Culpepper loses final competition and apparently puts something in Steven’s tea on final exam day, causing him to fail miserably. And Harding – school’s worst nightmare, king of mayhem and cruel jokes. And Paul, Ben’s brother, unusually smart for a boy of his age, admirer of Torys and Margaret Thatcher in particular, sharp contrast to Doug’s perception of things, amplified by use of Special Patrol Guard (SPG) against demonstrating workers he witnesses personally.

Coe is a great storyteller. He offers a precious insight in what it felt like to grow up in 70’s in an industrial British city. I haven’t read about anybody so much in love as Ben for a long time (and enjoyed it).

   *****

NICHOLAS ROYLE

The Director’s Cut

Theme: Four friends - extreme cinephiles – make an underground movie of a man’s suicide, but as it really a suicide and did it make them famous?

Point: you can never hide from your past no matter how hard you try

Storyline:

It all starts on the beach, with a widow looking for amber stones. Peggy Burns fascinates local jeweller, who becomes the storyteller. Back in 1982 Iain Burns, cinema projector, finds out he is ill with tertiary syphilis. He prepares a plan of disappearance from his wife’s life, hides himself in London in a flat of Andrew Kerner (photographer), where he meets Frank (gave up film making to become a critic), Harry Foxx (frustrated arthouse director whose only movie Nine South Street didn’t so much get released as managed to escape), Richard (achieved some commercial success by making trash movies) and Angelo (film dispatch clerk, who collects air from to-be-demolished cinemas in videotape boxes). Somebody comes up with the idea to make a documentary about Iain’s suicide, which he plans to commit anyhow. In an abandoned old cinema house at Tottenham Court Road they arrange the stage and leave Iain to himself, coming back only to change the reels.

Fraser Munro, a boy abused by his foster father, leaves the house at the age of 16 and succeeds to get scholarship at Stirling University only to leave it again after having realised he has to make films (shots of cadavers herein being the first one). He finds out there is another Fraser Munro filmmaker in the UK and decides to kill him and take over his identity. He becomes pure case of split personality (Multiple Person Disorder) and spends part of his life in an old tube station, being underground serial killer, and part – as Richard Charnock. He kills Harry because he is apparently very close to discover something is not right, Frank gets a clue almost too late, but fortunately Richard-Fraser gets killed by coming train just as he readies for strike at Jenny Shade, model and the only character of his personal porn movie Black Dress.

One of the major characters of this book is the disappearing world of London old cinemas, being replaced with soulless multiplexes. Author disposes of undoubted expertise in this field, though it was tiresome at times. Angelo’s quest for the Museum of lost cinema spaces is a good idea as well as not definitely closed end.

***

JEFF NOON

Needle in the Groove

Theme: Two girls and two boys meet in a band in Manchester, suicide of the drummer comes right after the first single is released, almost killing the group

Point: Music is worth dying for, or is it something else?

Storyline:

Elliot Hill comes into studio hidden in the basement of Manchester music club for an audition. The band called Glam Damage consists of dj Jody, drummer 2spot and his girlfriend – singer Donna. Elliot just lately recovered from drug addiction, but otherwise seems to blend perfectly, contributing a lot to the success of Scorched out for love. Sci-fi element is the vibe-remix-globe, sort of music recording medium, whereas some strange liquid inside holds the rhythm and tune, easily to be remixed just by shaking it… 2spot disappears once again, but this time for good – he commits suicide exactly the same way as his beloved grandfather George Axle (frontsman of skiffle band Glamour Boys, whom he never met) did, cutting open his wrists in a hotel bathroom. Using the globe liquid as a dope can bring you back in time to the places where samplers originated, that is why Donna injects the needle and Elliot follows her, just to find out it was not his dad David doing deep down and dirty in a van after closing night in the club, but Deezil – 2spot’s father. However nobody knows if what you see on such a trip is completely true… One way or another it gives some sense to the bass strings Elliot was being presented for birthdays – G D A E as George Deezil Axle Elliot… Hallucinogenic, psychedelic, at times disturbing read, took a while to get used to it.

“Noon has invented strange new kind of language: text mixed and sampled like a dance record. Chapters repeat themselves – scratched and distorted, remixed and remastered, and there is a beat underneath it all, as exciting as drugs and music” (Maxim).

***

WILL SELF

How the Dead Live

Theme: See title

Point: There is an afterlife after all, but expect neither heaven nor hell

Storyline:

Lily Bloom is a Jewish woman, who hates her roots so much she becomes rare case of Jew-anti Semitist. Blond hair, plump body, large tits, “keel of a nose”. Married three times, spent her life in the USA and London, not liking either. Worked as a designer – hints that she was the unknown author of so popular pillbox-shaped pen caps. Raised two daughters: Charlotte inherited her father’s talent and skills, married Richard and now they work together on moving from seriously wealthy to unbelievably rich, the only problem between them and total happiness being inability to conceive. Lily does not like this one too much, as Charlotte reminds her of Yaws too much, her favourite is Natasha, classic case of young drug addict. Lily is a chain smoker, does not stop even after being diagnosed with heavy bronchitis, develops breast cancer, has one amputated and finally dies from lung cancer. This moment comes at half of the book, the rest is about her days in subtle body in Dulston quarters, accompanied occasionally by her death guide Phar Lap Jones, Australian aborigine (all death guides are Buddhist monks, shamans, medicinmen etc.) and her long dead, nine year old Dave the Rude Boy (died when ran into a car, chased by his mother) and Lithy (lithopedion is a calcinated remnant of foetus that died somewhere in her womb), who chants pop ditties endlessly. It is not hell, though her basement apartment in Argos Road is a terrible one, neither it is heaven, however now she may smoke 130 a day no more harm done. World controlled by deatheaucracy, where you go to work, attend silly parties and pretend you eat (subtle body does not feel, hurt, hunger….), buy ciggies in a cornershop etc. After some fifteen years Lily comes back as junky Natty’s daughter, which seems as the real punishment for all her sins. But the last thing this book seems to be is a moral story.

Strange, difficult read. Rich vocabulary, quite demanding to follow all the way.

***

MIKE GAYLE

Turning Thirty

Theme: Three months in a life of software developer, who is about to reach thirty years of age

Point: Becoming an adult is not a question of any exact age + take care of your friends and they will take care of you

Storyline:

Matt Beckford, born in Birmingham, works for a multinational software developing company in New York. Since childhood he keeps thinking of his thirtieth birthday as a magical moment of utmost significance in his life. While his dream of job is fulfilled and desired wine rack can be easily bought, his love life is a pitiful one. Just as the big moment comes closer he splits up with his American girlfriend Elaine, in a horribly civilised, emotionless manner. He is given three months of holiday before going to join the company branch in Sydney and comes back to Birmingham. His best friend Gershwin is married to Zoe, they have four year old child and seem to be happy together. His ex-girlfriend/not ex-girlfriend Ginny Pascoe he apparently ends up in bed with each time they meet is dating nonchalant Ian. Reunion works between the three, even Bev, Kat and Pete join the club for once again. Matt has problems with living under one roof with parents (gorgeous scene with sprouts) and is offered to move in with Ginny in a spare room. They find way back to each other, this time it seems really serious, Matt even thinks of turning down the Australian offer, but after six days of love his doubts overrun him once again. All the while he keeps in touch with Elaine via e-mail and even she does not get what is the problem. When the D day finally comes, Ginny organises school reunion but does not attend it as they separated once again and she wants Matt to enjoy it. At the end (after message left on the machine) she comes and asks him to be introduced to Elaine. One year later Matt and Elaine still keep sending witty e-mails to each other, both being still (and probably forever) single.

Story of a nice guy, whose personal tragedy is perhaps thinking too much. Another example of “normal-relationship” incapability in modern British novel.

***

MARK HADDON

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time

Theme: Quite original detective story – 15 year old boy with Asperger’s syndrome is trying to find the killer of neighbour’s dog

Point: There is nothing logical about human beings and life, which may get really complicated

Storyline:

Christopher Boone finds Wellington, Mrs Shears’ dog, pinned to the ground with garden fork. He decides to start detecting. His teacher in the school for kids with Special Needs Siobhan tells him to write a book about something interesting, and this seems to be it. Christopher lives with his Father. He doesn’t like colours yellow and brown, never tells lies, hates being touched and dreams about deadly virus, leaving just a few people just like him in the whole world. His investigation leads him to unknown waters of talking to strangers (which is a metaphor and he does not understand it, as well as he does not get jokes and complicates things even further by imagining what does not exist). Mrs Anderson discloses major secret - his Mother had an affair with Mr Shears. He writes it down in his book, which is taken away by angry Father later on. When looking for it Christopher discovers many letters in a cupboard addressed to him, apparently from Mother, which makes no sense as she should have been dead for two years now. Step by step he comes to realisation Father had lied to him – Mother did not die in a hospital from heart attack, but fled Swindon with Mr Shears instead. Father does not only admit this – he confesses the murder of Wellington, too. Christopher doesn’t feel safe anymore and decides to live in London with his Mother. After rather incredible journey (he knows little about humans but is pretty systematic) he succeeds to find the Mother’s flat, but it can’t work, as her relationship is breaking apart. They come back together to Swindon just in time for Christopher to do his Math A level (he excels in Math and Physics). The road back to mutual understanding with Father will be long, and to achieve what he wants even longer, but Christopher is determined and knows he can do anything now.

Clear style, brilliant idea, and simple sentences full of basic truths reminding a bit of Vonnegut at times.

******

NICK HORNBY

High Fidelity

Theme: Rob Fleming is thirty-five and recently left by his longest relationship

Point: It is better to have someone to sort yourself out

Storyline:

Rob owns Championship Vinyl shop with rare albums, giving job to cheeky cynic Barry, who is in a dire need to get laid, and humble Dick. The trio knows a great deal about music, but real life somehow seeps through their fingers. Book opens with a list of top five relationships, as TOP FIVE records of any sort fill in the mostly quiet hours in not-so-well-off shop. Rob feels there is something wrong with him, because from the very beginning it was him who got dumped, lately by Laura who lived in the same flat for three years. He finds out about Ian/Ray, guy from upstairs they were making so many jokes about (especially his ability to do it for endless periods of time). Rob becomes obsessed with the idea that sex is to blame, even more so when Laura’s friend Liz tells him there is not much going on between them and hints Ray is a disaster. Rob’s relationship with parents is apparently not a heart bound one. There is a strange one night stand with American singer – songwriter Marie LaSalle, but Rob is too confused about everything to know if this is it. After a terrible experience (he’s been given the understanding look by some similar case in the cinema ticket box queue when coming for a movie with his parents) Rob decides to find out about what is wrong and looks up the top five girls. But even Charlie is not capable of drawing up the curtain.

Laura’s dad dies of some terminal disease and Rob is invited for funeral. He leaves before the end in sulk after a row with Liz and Laura’s sister, jumps over fence not just in time to hide from Laura’s car coming to bring him back. It is the first time she really seems to be thinking about coming back, but it is a long way for both back to normal. Laura succeeded in clearing things up in her head a bit, she organizes Groucho Club night revival for Rob as a late birthday present (partly to show him there are possibilities he should go for, even DJing is better than endless waiting for something to come). Rob proposes to Laura, in his own way – not really waiting for an answer.

Another sample of easy, funny read about not so much easy and rather depressing things. But what is there to be bothered about when materially everything is taken care of?

****

NICK HORNBY

Fever Pitch

 Theme: Hornby's life as a football-obsessive

Point: "There is a part of me that was afraid to write all this down in a book, just as the part of me was afraid to explain to a therapist precisely what it had all come to mean; I was worried that by so doing it would all go, and I'd be left with this great big hole where football used to be."

Storyline:

Well, there's not much else to be added to the lines above. This book provides an interesting insight into the mind of a real football fan. It tells a lot about other things than the sport itself (maybe a lot more than I've caught), and thanks to author's style and ability of self-criticism even such a sports illiterate like me can enjoy it. One can take it as quite detailed chronicle of Arsenal club history, because all the chapters are framed by actual date of a match and the events of Hornby's life are projected on this background, be it his relationship with father, love life, education or career.

Definitely a pleasure for football enthusiasts, I would recommend even to other readers, but obviously be aware of large portion of kicking-the-ball stuff.

NICK HORNBY

About A Boy 

Theme: A man and a boy teach each other lessons they somehow missed in their lives

Point: It is much more convenient in life to act your age after all

Storyline:

Will is thirty-six but acts like a teenager. Single, child-free and still feeling cool, he reads the right magazines, listens to the right music, goes to the right clubs and knows which trainers to wear. He's also discovered a great way to score with women at single parents' groups (he invents son Ned and an ex), full of available and grateful mothers, all waiting for Mr. Nice Guy. That's where he meets Marcus, the oldest twelve-year-old in the world. After a picnic in park, where Marcus succeeds to kill a duck with a piece of French bread, they go back home to find Fiona, Marcus's mother, lying on sofa after suicidal attempt.

Marcus is a bit strange, he listens to Joni Mitchell and Mozart, he looks after his Mum and he's never even owned a pair of trainers. The two guys are getting closer, as Marcus comes to Will's flat after school, in the beginning to escape from  the bullies who make him a welcome target. Will starts to teach him how to be a child, and provides him with bits of crucial information, such as who is Kurt Cobain of Nirvana. This news comes handy when there is need to make friends with Ellie, enfant terrible of the school, who wears Cobain T-shirt all the time. She becomes sort of protector, and Marcus wants "to be more with her", just one of the signs he is getting more normal due to friendship with Will. But the thing works reciprocally – Will is growing up.

"Please, Mum. Don't."

"Don't be silly. You love singing. You love Joni Mitchell."

"I don't. Not anymore. I bloody hate Joni Mitchell."

Will knew then, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that Marcus would be OK.

******

STEPHEN FRY

The Hippopotamus

Theme: Edward Wallace is commissioned to do sort of private investigation in his old friend’s house

Point: Things are not always what they seem to be

Storyline:

Ted Wallace is  an old, sour and womanising, cantankerous, whisky-sodden beast of a failed poet and drama critic, cynical misanthropist – or this is what he appears to be for most of the book. Recently fired from his last job he can hardly object to a proposal made by his goddaughter Jane, suffering from leukaemia – to come for a visit of his school friend Michael Logan’s house at Swafford, have his eyes open and send her letters with all the observations to be made there. Tedward would have refused on the spot, if nothing else it’s strange she looked him up in his favourite pub, but one cannot easily turn down an offer of hundred thousand quid right now and rest of a million to follow. He uses his grandson David to arrange for an invitation and everything seems to be exactly as uninteresting and dull at he beginning as he had expected. One night, possibly due to lack of pre-bed whisky, he wakes up round three and goes out for a walk, noticing traces in the lawn leading to nowhere. Desperate Tedward throws away the ten-year old malt he brought in an attempt to save the remnants of his sanity into a bucket.

Lilac, one of the horses, is sick, apparently because of some poisonous weed. David’s brother Simon, much more rural type, tries his best to save the horse, but there is little hope. There are other guests, too: homosexual Oliver with angina pectoris, Cliffords with ugly daughter Clara, Jane’s friend Patricia, Jane’s mother (old-time lover and now archenemy of Tedward) Rebecca, all of them enjoying a happy rest in the huge manor house. Story is revealed to Tedward, who knows nothing more than “something will come up” from Jane and is a bit confused, about how Davey has saved the life of his little brother, suffering from lung spasm, just by putting his hand on his chest. Rather shocking scene of David’s intercourse with the horse follows, not less disgusting hint of what happens between him and Oliver afterwards. 15 years old David apparently believes in his supernatural powers and develops a theory of ability to heal others with his body fluids. And so do the others, except Tedward. It is him, after quite extraordinary mishap of Clara’s treatment, when Simon intervenes just at the moment of fellatio climax in the woods and David’ cock is nearly bitten off, who comes to the right conclusion. Everybody’s belief, supported by the story of David’s grandfather, Jewish sugar beet farmer from Czechoslovakia, famous for his healing powers, made up all the fuss. There is nothing supernatural about the boy in fact: Lilac got better after overcoming terrible hangover from the bucketed whisky, Oliver is a typical make-believe, Clara blossoms because of Simon’s honest attention, little brother coughed thanks to Simon’s reviving efforts and Jane dies unexpectedly after the miraculous remission disappears.

Time for Tedward to come back to his own son Roman and play a bit of fatherhood. David accompanies them in McDonalds and it seems he may still be salvaged from the mental mess.

Good one, fruity language, nice plot, shocking surprises.

****

CHRISSIE GLAZEBROOK

The Madolescents

Theme: Madness, morticians and a large portion of chips

Point: Life of an adolescent may be one hell of an experience

Storyline:

16 years old Rowena M. Vincent is a trainee mortician, aspiring beautician, serial shoplifter and Warrior Princess. Complete mess, conscienceless liar and boneheaded monster if you ask me, but mebbes I’m getting older. I can’t be arsed to put this book straight, it follows her miserable life in ordinary sequence of extraordinary events due mostly to her twisted self. Holed up with her mum in a Newcastle suburb and living on a steady diet of Bailey’s and chips, Rowena fantasises about her absent dad and being constantly followed by whoever – CIA, MI5, UFO. Nothing much is clear till the final part, when she finds a picture of her dad in ABBA puzzle box, legacy from her grandma Nana, taken in Ireland two years ago. Another popular activity is developing her list of songs for funeral music. As she embarks on an energetic campaign to eliminate her mother’s new boyfriend, Bernard “Filthy” Luker, Rowena starts to lose her slippery grip on reality and is packed off to a teenage therapy group. They call themselves The Madolescents and come along with each other surprisingly well – outside the meeting room, of course. They even seal a strange pact during pagan ritual that brings her closer to Ash – mostly quiet handsome ponytail. He was dumped by his family when they’d found out about his transvestite bearings. Unfortunately after they make love (first time in Rowena’s case) he hangs himself, which ends up a promising chapter, giving the reader some hope there are bits of normality in her brain. But no – she plans final wake with Ash, forcing her wossname jobmate  Dean to assist. Wearing her Warrior princess outfit (called Porn queen kit by Mum) she is wed to the corpse, clothed in white luxurious frock bought with the money from Luker, ceremony executed by another group member Mickey. Unfortunately everything ends up in flames and Rowena sets sail off to Ireland...

There is one more important character, tomcat found in a deceased’s house, feral beast itself, called Trusty Sidekick Bundy. Apparently sent to help her devilish deeds up here on Earth, he keeps leaving dead rodents or even a rabbit on the porch. Its fleas are a biological weapon used in the war against Filthy. Et cetera.

Funny, though disturbing read at times. How sad is that?

****

IAIN M. BANKS

Consider Phlebas

Theme: Galactic war between Idirans and the Culture, adventure of an extraordinary warrior

Point: Is there ever any justifiable reason for war? What is the sense of human life?

Storyline:

Bora Horza Gobuchul is a Changer fighting on the Idirans’ side, not due to special sympathies to the species, more because of his hatred to the Culture, which relies too much upon machines, no matter how sophisticated ones, and lets them do the business. He is able to impersonate any humanoid being and uses the skill mostly to spy upon the Culture. There are not so many Changers left in the world, small base is located in Schar’s world, planet of the dead, where one of Culture’s Minds escaped recently. Horza is freed from Sorpen, governed by gerontocracy, by his masters in order to find and bring the Mind to Idirans. It’s the first of more narrow escapes, as he is almost submerged in the sewage, chained to the walls of underground cell. Unfortunately the ship Hand of God 137 is intercepted and destroyed. He succeeds to escape in his suit, just to be found by bunch of pirates led by Kraiklyn. After winning himself a place among “Free Company” by killing young recruit he assists with an unsuccessful assault on Temple of Light and realizes sooner or later he is going to replace the weird boss. Right opportunity seems to come with another round of Damage, basically poker game, just the players handle feelings instead of cards and for losing a hand they have to pay a life. Kraiklyn plans to rummage deserted megaship on Vavatch – orbital soon to be destroyed by Culture, because agreement was not reached on neutrality of the territory. Megaship crashes into an ice mountain and Horza crashes into the ocean with the shuttle. Close to death from exhaustion he is washed upon an island shore, inhabited by crazy sect of famished people led by incredibly fat monster. Fortunately it is not aware of Horza’s poisonous nails and dies after snapping off the Changer’s finger. Horza escapes in evac ship, just in time to buy his way into Damage hall and witness another Kraiklyn’s failure. After short fight in docks he kills Kraiklyn, comes aboard and finds out Culture agent Perosteck Balveda sneaked in. During suicidal escape from the hosting ship, firing his way through the decks, he’s got no time to dump her, so she accompanies the sad bunch to Schar’s world. His mate Yalson, tough woman, one of the best warriors in Clear Air Turbulence, tells him she is pregnant. Horza finds his love from last assignment on the planet dead and becomes more and more happy about new role, but unfortunately there are two Idirans and their medjel servants looking for the Mind as well. Several thousand miles of command system underground, built aeons ago by a civilisation that  destroyed itself, is the hiding place and playground of fierce battle with Idirans, who prove to be almost invincible. One of them, apparently dead at least according to human standards, manages to put one of gigantic trains into motion and create mayhem in which the other kills Yalson. The only survivor finally is Balveda, however much she tried to save Horza’s life.

Colourful, rich, imaginative. State of art science fiction piece, should be made into a movie. 

*****

IAIN M. BANKS

Against a Dark Background

  Theme: Team of specialists tries to retrieve an artefact and not be killed in the process

Point: Humans are the only species that kill their own kind (almost)

Storyline:

Halfway between Indiana Jones and Lara Croft, lady Sharrow, one of the two last remaining descendants of famous noble house Dascen, barely survives an attack of religious sect of Huhsz on a ski cabin, when her mother pushes her out just before she dies of her wounds. These fanatics believe that female line of the house prevents their messiah from coming and apply at the World Court for Passport – a death sentence approval. Sharrow is a leader of pack of specialist operating all around their Thrial solar system, or better to say around the habitable planets, i.e. water world of Trontsephori, Speyr, home of Golter, Miykenns, Roaval, Phrastesis and Nachtel. The first treasure they are after is a necklace – model of the system called Crownstar Addendum. This is when Sharrow meets two twins/clones who dispose of quite unpleasant power to cause her excruciating pain as they like remotely, due to implanted virus in her spine. Sharrow visits her sister Breyguhn in famous prison of Sea House, where inmates and local monks move on chain leashes fastened to rails in the walls. Breyguhn detests her, as younger, not so successful and beautiful siblings do. Sharrow wants to find the book of Universal Principles, which is the price of the sister's release. She travels to the land of Useless Kings, who prohibit use of any technology except weapons of their guards, and use quite sly ways to get the book, used as coronation relic. Yes – her party: Miz, handsome cool technician, is the only one she allows herself to "get involved", though she had never had a problem in this respect;  Cenuij is in love with Breyguhn, expert in ancient cultures, Zefla is a beauty never against a good drink and serves as the killer specialist with her brother Dloan. There is just dust in the metal casing, but the message is there – tracks lead to the Dead City inhabited by androids. The ultimate loot is the last of remaining Lazy Guns – strange device that is able to destroy anything from small creature to mid-sized city, choosing rather inventive adequate means. Sharrow no doubt leads the unknown pursuers to the Gun, almost dying in the process (more times) with a considerable help of she-android Feril, who reminds me a lot of Kryten. The book ends in mayhem back in the Sea House, where she finds out the shadow behind all her suffering has always been her cousin Geis. Very interesting idea of monowheel vehicle that accommodates to any surface and travels almost the sound of speed.

Well, I had fun, yes. But not as much as I used to. Am not sure whether it's the book itself or me not in the right mood. It is incredibly imaginative as usual; Banks can compete with Tolkien in making up his fantasy worlds. The idea is there, too. Maybe just too much action-movie style (and quite a movie it would be I assure you). Good relax anyway.

MARTIN AMIS

Information

Theme: A year or so in completely different lives of two novelists

Point: No matter what you do against the object of your hatred it will be always you consumed by it finally

Storyline:

Richard Tull and Gwyn Barry were schoolmates in Oxford, the former always smarter, brighter, more successful, the latter Welsh outshadowed. Richard had to struggle for Gina, at the time sort of assistant in local museum, he was beaten by her first love Lawrence and moved to another girlfriend “without the curse”, into her black painted bedroom. He kept coming round Gina, though (or maybe because) he knew she had been sleeping with other writers – poets, playwrights, novelists. Finally they married and had two sons – Marius and Marco. In the meantime Richard published two novels with almost moderate success, attracting the attention of intellectually demanding and as such rather limited readership. Gwyn was introduced to nobility daughter Demeter, sent his highschool sweetheart home (subsequently mental asylum) and married Demi, which apparently launched his career of bestseller writer. Namely his second book Amelior about some quasi-hippie community, representing all races and professions, building ideal society somewhere in France, is conquering the market even in America. Richard is eaten by envy, his life of reviewer for Little Magazine and other minor periodicals is more and more miserable. It seems there is only one person in the world that succeeded in completing his last book “Untitled” – new model hero Steve Cousins, sickhead aggressor with colourful criminal past. Steve arranges for regular beatings of Gwyn in dark street corners. Richard is offered to write Gwyn’s biography, which provides him at least with a chance to visit the USA together. He has a cunning plan of talking commission members of Profundity Requital (some prize for talented writers) out of the idea of nominating Gwyn, but inevitably fails. The same can be said about his public reading and sales of Untitled (he is carrying heavy bag with the only printed copies around the States in hopeless effort to place them on the market...). Gwyn just seems to be a victim, I’m not sure whether because of the knowledge Richard tried to seduce Demi, because he has a clue who is behind the beatings or due to desire to humiliate his rival even further he pays Gina for having sex with him. There are three things Gwyn always loses to Richard: tennis, snooker and chess. After well paid training of a few tricks Gwyn organises sort of triathlon in one day, and unsurprisingly wins everything. Richard’s humiliation reaches the top when catching his wife and “friend” in flagranti. He changes his mind and explains to a tabloid journalist Rory that the story of “there being an original to Amelior and Gwyn just an ordinary plagiator” is another hoax. Maybe he finally realises who is the ultimate loser anyway..?

Interesting story of envy and hatred, not an easy read regarding vocabulary, style and the topic itself.

***

CHRISTOPHER BROOKMYRE

One Fine Day in the Middle of the Night

Theme: Reminiscence, reconciliation, old secrets, rekindled passions, joy, laughter, hijackers, murder, vengeance, machine-guns and stuff

Point: People attend school reunion parties to make sure there are other leading even worse life and to their old selves, when all opportunities were open

Storyline:

It is a messy business from the very beginning. On short notice call from his always better and one step ahead colleague Dawson, former paramilitary, now mercenary Connor gathers the best bunch of terrorists he can given the limited time, but not good enough not to shot at themselves even before real action starts. Just-retired police officer of Cromarty Firth station McGregor happens to walk around as a severed arm hits him due to an explosion. During his incredible escape he manages to crash stolen Renault, injure an officer with rammed sheep and damage three police cars. No wonder sheep-shagging hillbilly, bred-teuchter numpty replacement does not give him much credit for the hunch there is something very bad going on. And meanwhile....

Gavin Hutchison, always a grey mouse, now successful tourism industry tycoon, comes up with an idea to save the overdebted project of reconstructing abandoned oilrig in a holiday resort (the British have extremely low sense of adventure holiday making, give them everything they are used to in just a bit better weather and you’re going to become filthy rich). He organizes reunion party for St. Michael’s Auchenlea school ex-pupils in a hope he will finally be recognised and at the same time get much needed PR support together with a few reservations maybe. But his American partner develops other scheme: insurance fraud based on pretty interesting sum in case of a force majeure that includes terrorist attack (the resort to be towed near African shores). That is why Dawson is in fact happy for the Connor’s party to be a bunch of amateurs, accidentally bumping into few souls, who do not give up that easy:

Matthew Black – standup comedian, now engaged in some worthless American sitcom and just about changing his life completely, running into

Simone Draper/Hutchison – housewife fully aware of her unbeloved husband’s adultery, just about to spoil his great party by announcing publicly she is leaving him

Davie Murdoch – ruthless aggressor back in the school days, miraculously having raised out of the deep shit of crime/prison cycle, living with a happy family of his in New York.

Ally McQuaide – back in the school days much funnier than Matt, now electrician enjoying his job and sharing the household with once unapproachable Annette, and last but not least

“Acks” Jackson, one of the few real professionals who shifted sides coming to realise he would never find rationale good enough to explain involvement in such disaster to himself.

Exactly the mixture of thrill and fun I love in books. Very recommendable relax-read for those who do not seek “higher artistic values”, just page-turning experience of laugh and the essential wonder of HOW WILL THIS TURN OUT no matter how much you know the end is going to be happier than happy....

*****

CHRISTOPHER BROOKMYRE

A Big Boy Did It and Ran Away

Theme: A long-dead friendship bears unexpected fruit – massive terrorist attack prepared by one of the friends is finally in shambles thanks to the other.

Point: It takes very selfish, emotionless and unhappy person to make real terrorist

Storyline:

Raymond Ash has already tried several careers and it seems he will never definitely settle down, though recently he started as an English teacher in a move to provide for his wife Kate and newborn Martin. The little one has a colic and both parents are truly exhausted – that is also why Ray passes by the airport on his way home to make time for himself and his thoughts of changing the lifestyle just a bit longer. Once he spots a friend from Glasgow Uni years, Simon Darcourt, which would not be anything extraordinary if only Simon was not dead for two years...

Angelique de Xavia joined the special Interpol dept. on her way up in the police hierarchy. Her colleagues are mistaken by her tiny posture until she proves her black belts in four martial arts in reply to cheeky comments. She is after Black Spirit – number one terrorist pro, named after the picture on cards he leaves on the crime scenes as a signature.

For Simon all people are Suburban Sad Cunts. His father died of heart attack after being racketeered for years by Frank Morris, local underground boss. Frank becomes his first victim (frozen bolt through eye shot from a crossbow), followed by many others on the way to promising career of assassin. Simon moves forward to mass murder – organises  explosion aboard the flight to Stavanger and disappears allegedly as one of the victims. He is hired by real underground tycoon to lead major terrorist attack against UK, which leads him back to his homeland and to brief eye contact with Ray at the airport. Thus Ray becomes unfortunate part of the puzzle, playing the role of finally escaping hostage to inform the police of false target, while the real one is Dubh Ardrain, unique water-geo power plant and dam in Scottish highlands. Ray and Angelique realise the scheme just in time to get on the spot and solve the matter, with a considerable help of Wee Murph and Lexy, two schoolboys, who disappeared at the same time as Ray (which led journalists to quick suspicion he was a child molester). Their curiosity led them inside the truck, where all the gear and later Ray with his car have been stored, their bravery told them to stuff mouths of machine guns and sabotage the drills, which paid off later on.

In a classic movie-style final scene the two meet, in a control room that overlooks the plant now under water, and it is this time Ray truly realises how much he wants to go back to his family and ordinary life, being confronted with the same selfish, arrogant and overlooking Simon as ever.

Catching, one-breath read, piece of writer craftsmanship, a bit open end for case of success and need to be continued...

*****

ALEXANDER McCALL SMITH

The No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency

Theme: How to establish and run private detective business in Botswana when you are a fat 35 years old lady

Point: For me – there are quite civilised people in Africa, maybe leading richer lives than we whites do

Storyline:

Precious Ramotswe is a daughter of Obed Ramotswe, miner in South-Africa, who saved all his money to ensure better future for her. Before he dies on silicosis he tells his daughter to sell the cattle and start a business of her own. So she does. The cases are quite ordinary ones – mostly unfaithful husbands and stolen things, but then there is some extraordinary stuff as well. Take those twins, one real doctor and the other just impersonating medical skills, operating two practices on one diploma. Or the insurance fraud with the same finger cut off for third time by a machine of clueless employer. But most of all the missing boy, most probably victim of dark-age beliefs in magical objects made of children’s bodies. Mma Ramotswe’s friend J.L.B. Matekoni is a car mechanic and just accidentally comes across a leather pouch in the glove compartment of repaired car. Influential figure of Mr. Gotso is involved, which does not make things easier. They prepare cunning scheme. Matekoni tells Gotso’s assistant there were some intruders breaking into the car through windshield and should there be anything lost he can arrange for a private detective... That is how Mma gets to Gotso himself and obtains a map to find the supplier/murderer. Fortunately the boy is not dead yet. When Matekoni proposes for the second time he unexpectedly succeeds (Mma declined his first offer as she does not believe she needs any man in her life after terrible experience with a jazz musician who used to beat her).

Totally different barrel. Slow, comfortable temp, exotic environment apparently well-known to the author. Smooth read from another planet.

*****

ALEXANDER McCALL SMITH

Morality for Beautiful Girls

  Theme: How to run a detective agency and a car repair shop at once

Point: Botswana is the nicest country, different from others in Africa, though not without problems

Storyline:

In this third volume of Smith's African series the irrepressible Precious Ramotswe faces supreme problems at home and at work, and as usually includes deep thoughts of basic things of life, simply put and crystal clear. With her detective agency in financial difficulty, Mma Ramotswe takes the hard decision to share offices with her husband-to-be, Mr. J.L.B.Matekoni. But even though Tlokweng Road Speedy Motors could do with a little help,it is Mr. Matekoni himself, who requires her attention. Good luck there is her Mma Makutsi, Assistant detective promoted to Assistant Manager of the garage. Mr. Matekoni displays signs of depression, more specifically low serotonin level, and Mma Ramotswe asks her friend, director of orphanage,  for help. If that wasn't enough, the agency is facing some of its mist puzzling cases: the government official whose sister in law is allegedly trying to poison his brother (in fact an unhappy cook is the culprit); the beauty pageant whose contestants are not as good as their looks. Mma Makutsi can tell – these are bad girls, spending their days in bars and ruining families of married men. Strange boy is found naked and wild, smelling of lions…

Here are just some examples of the topics covered: business, anthropology, traditional values, beautiful girls having all the fun, family ties etc.

*****

 ALEXANDER MCCALL SMITH

The Sunday Philosophy Club

Theme: Editor of the review of applied ethics tries to investigate a criminal case

Point: There is greed, dishonesty and murderous intent behind Edinburgh's regimented Georgian facades

Storyline:

Isabel Dalhousie attends Reykjavik Symphony concert and sees a young man fall from the upper circle in the very first sentence of the book. She feels involved in the matter this way and begins her own investigation, using friends like Jamie (young bassoonist and music teacher, not going out with her niece Cat anymore) or stockbroker Peter. The deceased worked for a financial group, and his flatmate Neil reveals there was some wrongdoing, more specifically insider trading, and maybe… Isabel develops the idea of conspiracy against the young colleague and tries to prove it. In the meantime she succeeds to convince her niece that beloved Toby is not worth her, as he is interested in the money and not pure love. Isabel is scared to death by one of the people involved in the investigation and realises this is too much. Fortunately there are people who can – and will – help her, as they have their own unfinished business with the perpetrator. But finally we find out together with Isabel that yes – it was no suicide, but no – it was not about money fraud. You have one educated guess. Bravo – it was jealousy once again. Neil had not been as successful with Hen and during just another argument on the balcony he pushed the poor guy, not meaning to kill.

It's definitely AMS at his best. The story is smooth as milk, it flows and enriches you with really philosophical notions of the heroine, undoubtedly the ones that haunt the author himself. There is a common denominator to Isabel and Mma Ramotswe – their understanding of soul twists and deep interest in all things human. So you may relax well reading this book, but at the same time indulge yourself by views of the affairs around us, if you feel like it.

****

ANNE DONOVAN

Buddha Da

Theme: A year or so in the life of ordinary Scottish family made a bit difficult by father’s spiritual bearings

Point: Even the purest and most selfless ideas may harm someone

Storyline:

Jimmy McKenna is a wall painter. He lives wi his wifie Liz and 12 years old lassie Anne Marie in Glesga and they seem to be quite happy. Jimmy comes across an invitation to Buddhist Centre and becomes caught by the atmosphere and ideas. At first Liz thinks this would be just another thing to pass by, but this time she is wrong, no matter how much she has always been the one who knew best in this family. Jimmy is more and more involved, he helps lamas to look for new dalai lama apparently born in Glasgow suburbs (and makes an eejit of himself in front of his daughter), after weekend camp he stops eating meat (though cutting carrot for soup almost cost him a finger) and drinking booze after pissing his heid oot at his brother’s birthday party. The real problem starts when he decides to go even further: to celibate. He doesn’t realize how difficult it is for Liz and after an argument moves out to stay in the Centre. He keeps coming back to the hoose efter work to have tea and watch videos with Anne Marie when Liz feels like going oot. Anne Marie is growing fast and her old friends do not seem to be as exciting as they used to be back in primary (she doesn’t enjoy endless talks about hairdos and boys from upper forms), but fortunately there is Nisha. They are good match, sharing common sense and likings of Madonna, whom they impersonate using Nisha’s brother’s karaoke machine. Anne Marie is a star of Christmas school academy, but Jimmy is not there – he preferred the lecture of Tibetan Rinpoche on visit. Liz meets David, an endless student, at one of her colleague’s parties. It takes a while, but almost inevitably they end up in bed (or kitchen floor the first time). Liz knows she should tell Anne Marie, but postpones the decision until it is too late – she is pregnant. David is not exactly pleased with the fact, not ready for a wean and to make it even worse he is about to leave for the USA for one year. Liz tells Jimmy, who comes back to the Centre and starts to realise what is going on in real life. In a rage he destroys picture of Buddha on the wall, his masterpiece. Anne Marie and Nisha finally succeed (with just technical help from Gurpreet) to finish their recording for BBC competition (mix of Salve Regina and lamas chanting), two weeks later there is a phone call – the song was selected to be among the ten for winners’ CD. In summer McKennas decide to go to beach resort as usually. Worried about what she would say to that the parents are in a shock when Anne Marie welcomes the news with genuine pleasure (she knew nothing about David after all). Jimmy is a different person now and months of separation may well pay off – he offers Liz to keep the baby and come back thegether.

Similar to movies, I find myself less and less enjoying incredible plots of horrors, thrillers and other Hollywood stuff. And vice versa – there is a great deal of excitement for me in the stories that may pretty well happen in real life. And with a bit of exotic spice (myself once thinking about buddhism as a way forward) it is exactly what I want from a good read. Yeah – and well measured portion of Scots and the idea of chapters written as if by one of the actors each in a sequence.

*****

IRVINE WELSH

Trainspotting

 Theme: Everyday life of human thrash in the capital of Scotland and elsewhere

Point: It’s up to anybody to decide how to handle their lives – you may even want to destroy yourself, but be ready for some real pain

Storyline:

The only official birth-certificate name I know for sure is Mark Renton, aka Rents. He is the main character as well, if there is any. In his late twenties or early thirties (ordinary facts do not seem to matter much in this book) he is an H addict, forever trying to kick the habit and failing over and over again. One of the most memorable scenes in a pub’s toilet (looking for heroin substitute capsules in the full bowl). Still – if there is a chance for anyone, then I would bet on Rents. Another squad member is Sick Boy, with whom burds huv a shag as easily as they have a conversation with males. In the AIDS stricken era he is one of sure victims. He tracks back the culprit, man who raped a girl he slept with and was infected by. He attends therapy with Venters just to get closer to him and begins to develop his diabolic plan of revenge: the only human being the scum cares about is his son. Sick Boy has little problem with Venters’ ex and as soon as he gains enough trust, he encourages her to go out and takes pictures of him and the (doped) boy. Venters sees his son being tortured and murdered before Sick Boy presses a pillow to his face. Another junky in the band is rather submissive Spud who would not hurt a fly, but tourists’ pockets and unguarded shops are never safe. So much for guys you might even feel sympathy for under certain circumstances. The quintet is completed with Second Price, once upon a time promising soccer talent, drinking his way through to the cemetery. And the worst of them Begbie, remorseless brute with twisted mind of a “protector”, while in fact his “friends” are just too scared to tell him frankly what they feel and go on contributing to his endless self-appreciating stories of a great fighter. The stage is full of other small people – dealer Mother Superior, Kelly whose newborn died of Cot death syndrome, Rents’ parents etc. However, no light in the dark-grey colours of the scene.

If I had to describe this piece in one word it would be TOUGH. Tough basically for two reasons: most of the book is written in Scots and it is – how shall I put it – wide open. No symbols, no euphemisms, no makeup, just raw reality of the world of young addicts, hopeless, aimless, depressing, decadent. There is no traditional scheme of a story telling (forget about exposition, collision, crisis, catharsis etc. – every page is a sort of these all mixed together) as there is no traditional pattern in their lives. And this appears to be exactly the point – they are more afraid of being normal, of wifie-bairn-hoose-joab etc. scheme than of suffering unimaginably from cold turkey, hangover or beaten body.

Well, to be exact maybe there is a bit of light at the end of the tunnel, though far from a happy ending: Renton runs away with money they got paid for delivery of skag to London. He is planning to live in Amsterdam of all places....

IRVINE WELSH

Acid House 

Theme: complicated life of society's scum

Point: there are human feelings even among those considered inhuman by "normal" standards

Stories:

The Shooter – Gary and Jock are after their employer, who does not pay; Gary's shotgun is not there to increase the threat, as he suspects everybody of fucking his wife while he was in prison, finally Jock, too…

Eurotrash – big surprise for the main character, who got involved with Chrissie in Amsterdam, after her suicide the parents at funeral talk about Chris…

Stoke Newington Blues – It is not easy to sustain coppers' pressure and not to grass up when they even offer some skag…

VAT '96 – Fiona keeps living head of her Keith in a special sci-fi tank after his lethal accident …

A Soft Touch – Katriona and her ruthless brothers terrorize John, father of her child, but John is always willing to give another chance…

The Last Resort on the Adriatic – there has been no life for Jim after Joan's suicide committed right here on this cruiser years ago…

Sexual Disaster Quartet – Laughter and sex are the barometers of a relationship, but no at the same time, ya fuckin cow…

Snuff – Ian Smith's life consists of mad watching of videos according to a catalogue; when there is none left, he makes his own final one…

A Blockage in the System – The plumbers simply won't clean the clogged sewage, they have their workers' rights and unions…

Wayne Foster – The Classical Scholar barman won't serve the two Sparryheids…

Where the Debris Meets the Sea – Madonna, Victoria Principal, Kylie Minogue and Kim Basinger dream about a love affair with some representative of Scottish proletariat…

Granny's Old Junk – Graham Abercrombie came to visit his grandma to steal some money from her tin box, but there is something much more interesting inside and they make a perfect dealing couple…

The House of John Deaf – the cunt should never have started wi ma sister

Across the Hall - Frank and Stephanie living next door will never make it together no matter how much they dream about it…

Lisa's Mum Meets the Queen Mum

The Two Philosophers – finally settle their endless dispute manually in front of ecstatic pub crowd…

The Granton Star Cause – Boab has a really unlucky day, after all the injustice God decides to transform him in a fly…

Snowman Building Parts for Rice the Squirrel

Sport for All – a dumbheaded fan tries to provoke a fight, unsuccessfully this time…

The Acid House – Coco Bryce is hit by a lightning and the energy exchanges his mind into a body of a newborn…

A Smart Cunt – Brian will always be just a smart cunt, be it in his job as Park caretaker, office assistant or mostly another good-for-nothing of Welsh's characters. Reminds one of Trainspotting, even some names are common (Spud).

Major part of the book is usually depressing read, but then what do you expect from the master of skag drama? I had fun at times, appreciated the non-typical sci-fi and fantasy experiments, but it'll be enough of Welsh for some time now…

****

Very educational experience. Many things previously just felt are defined and said out loud here. I've a strange feeling sometimes of deep similarities "Haven't I told you..?", but wouldn't go as far as suggest that the Czechs and the English have a lot in common. Maybe it's more about me being too much immersed in British books – thinking.

******

CLIVE BARKER

Cabal 

Theme: Journey to the living dead and (sort of) back

Point: Love is stronger than death

Storyline:

Aaron Boone has some psychic problem, and he attends the office of psychiatrist Decker. Together they try to find out, whether it's really Boone the serial brutal killer, as Boone does not remember much and has no alibi for the incriminating moments of murders. Pictures form the crime scenes make him sick, but does that prove anything? Boone jumps under a passing truck, but the suicidal attempt fails. In the hospital he meets Narcisse, apparently mad man blabbing incoherently about a place of salvation called Midian. Boone sees light in the end of the tunnel, and gets on the way direction Athabasca immediately. Midian is a ghost town with amazingly vast cemetery. The tombs and mausoleums above are impressive, but what's even more interesting lies underground. Boone is bitten by some monster, which makes him undead as well. He survives bullets shot through him by the police and Decker, who turns out to be the real murderer. Boone's lover Lori comes looking for Boone, as she can't believe his body was stolen from mortuary. Boone saves her life when Decker attacks, and the undead community expels him. It's too late – the police accompanied by local mob are coming to burn the place down, and the Nightbreed are forced from the underworld to sunlight, which kills them. Boone is called by Baphomet, founder of the place, and made Cabal – saviour of the dispersed flock.

Huh, interesting change. I haven't read a piece of horror since my favourite Stephen King long ago. But I'm not comparing, this story is much more open-plan, maybe too much for me. And no matter how weird it is to ask for at least a bit of credibility in a ghost story, that's what I can't prevent myself from doing. In vain this time.

***

JEANETTE WINTERSON

Oranges are not the Only Fruit 

Theme: From religious slavery to uncertainty of free life

Point: Love is stronger than faith

Storyline:

Jeanette was adopted from an orphanage by bigot Christian. The lady is a strong personality, weird in her educational and just about all other ways for a normal citizen. Yes, there is a father, but the character is rather pale, almost non-existent throughout the book. The only male character that counts is a pastor, as Mother's hobby is to listen to World Service – summary of missionary work overseas. As Jeanette grows among the Sisterhood, facing problems with her "unholy" classmates, she realizes that "men are beasts". She becomes more than closely acquainted with newly converted Melanie. When the church finds out, they perform sort of exorcism on her. Jeanette sees her orange devil for the first time. For one year things are back to normal, until she meets Katy, who will be her companion for many years to come. This time she knows better than to confess to her mother, but they are caught at the end, and Jeanette has to leave. Coming back after a while she finds out that the Society of the Lord had problems with fraud and deceit, but it no longer concerns her, it only proves that the real dirt is something else than different sexual orientation.

If it hadn't been for the Reader's Group, I would have never finished it. I don't say it's a bad book, I'm just not into this lesbian stuff, no matter how decently put. And if you like to think about Christian faith in modern world, there are definitely better reads.

**

LEWIS DAVIES

Work, Sex & Rugby 

Theme: Four days in the life of ordinary young man

Point: There is nothing more painful than lost hope

Storyline:

Lewis works as an apprentice to Roy Watkins the Master Builder in his industrial home town, where he grew up, fell in love for the first time, fell from school at sixteen, and has worked, mated and played rugby. Lewis is an intelligent man, it's not that he would be handicapped by anything except his – what, laziness? Distaste for all those educated bossy types, like the one who dates his first love now? Different idea of success? Whatever it is, Lewis seems to be happy with it, at least most of the time. His approach is quite fatalistic, to be his own master seems to be the only thing that counts. Is he doomed to spend the rest of his days here, leading this "normal" life? Would that be a problem? Until death does him apart..?

The author shows cards at the end – the book is apparently autobiography. Which provides sort of answer to the question above.

***

JILL DAWSON

Magpie 

Theme: Single mother moves in a council flat and starts new life

Point: Everybody has to grow up one day                            

Storyline:

One there's a taxi in front of Flanders Estate. Illiterate Jamaican immigrant Josh is watching from his downstairs flat window. The girl looks more like a sister than a mother to that sullen boy. Little is known of Lily's past for best part of the book. We are introduced to her father Bob, once orphan, that's why food enthusiast now, calm down-to-earth man, and Brenda, agoraphobic housewife obsessed with catalogue shopping. And Matthew's father, who seems to have died in an accident. The firefighter had a different problem though – he needed counseling and that's how he met his new fate. Lily has an animal affair with Josh, which starts quite oddly by helping him read and write letters from and for Josh's wife, currently in Jamaica, not really willing to come back. Matthew has behavioral problems, all the time chewing on his collar and biting his classmates, not paying much attention to teachers. Lily finds a house-cleaning job, Josh's wife returns to London, and step by step the whole story is revealed. After a while she gets used to her new role of actual parent. Happy end? Kind of…

The book is apparently structured by some "Magpie" nursery rhyme, and I consider this to be one of the most interesting features… Anyway – life without any embellishments, dialogues inspired by real London, not a made-up one, would sum up this piece. Unfortunately I didn't find the story thrilling enough.

***

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